Here we go again

I’m sick and tired of keeping things in my head. I feel like I’m about to blow. Every waking minute, I spend thinking when am I just going to let it all out. When is everybody going to hear what I really feel about them. Some, I just don’t care about and some I’ll give my everything for them. When will people realize every little thing they do, annoys the crap out of me. I already see the faces. The begging. The tears running down their faces, surprised that I felt that way. Well, see I’ll just keep quiet. I’ll let myself get broken down, get tired of people’s bullshit, give people way too many chances, chances they don’t deserve, the chances that are meant for people who really care. But seriously, come on who really cares? Who are those handful of people that really care about everybody? I actually do, I care about everyone mostly, even people who had hurt me in the past. I’d even care for a random person that I saw walking down the block, maybe I’m just weird like that. Who knows?

Dear Dad,
Stop trying to buy my love. As I grow older, I realized how stupid and pathetic you are. Your jokes are rude and disgusting, they can hurt someone. Making fun of me or my brother? Your OWN kids, you’re stupid. They say my brother looks like you and acts like you, I don’t see it. I don’t see him turning into a total douche like you are. You always say I’ll end up on the streets or something worse. But you know what, I’ll show you. I’ll prove you wrong, I won’t laugh in your face like you do to me. I’ll just stand with my head high, walking like I own the place. Trust me, where you live now I would be able to. Don’t get me wrong, it’s funny how you try to make me feel bad, saying I’m not good enough for you. Just don’t come crying to me, when I’m living my life, and you’re broke. Don’t even say my name, like you know me. You don’t, you don’t even know when my birthday is. I get it, your other daughter is more important to you than my brother or I am. Don’t worry, she’ll see you how you really are when she gets to my age, or younger. You think making fun of people is funny, no it’s not. It just shows how ignorant you really are. No wonders you’re a nurse, you couldn’t even become a doctor. I don’t hate you, honestly I just despise you, despise everything you do.

Dear You,
I don’t believe anything that comes out of your goddamn mouth. Keep on talking, no one listens to you anyways. 
Love,
Me. 

Why is it so hard to tell you everything in my mind? You lost my trust and expect me to give it to you just like that. Are you kidding me? I’m pretty sure if I did the same thing that you did to me, you’ll be skeptical. But wait, you were never in my shoes, or anyone else’s. You only care for yourself. Your “friends” don’t give two shits about you, they don’t care like I do. It’s pathetic, I know. Have you ever wonder if they do?  If they really care for you? You’ll see one day, when there’s no one there for you except me. Me, pretty much will be right there for you no matter what, no matter what stupid shit you do, how many times you’ll hurt me.